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| eek! I did a red lip! First time for everything right?! |
I have always had issues with accepting my body. I would look in the mirror and pick myself apart. I would stare at my thighs and tell myself that they were so wide and fat. Yes I called myself fat [in my head] often. I wouldn't say that I always scrutinized myself but somewhere in the years right after high school and college my self-esteem took a dive.
I became very unhealthy-- eating out late and drinking for the wrong reasons. Some days I wouldn't eat all day, then I'd run to work and binge throughout the night. I was leading a very unhealthy lifestyle and it showed. It wasn't until the end of my undergrad years that I began to take care of my body because I wanted to change. I am not talking about dieting but really loving and respecting myself and my body. Shortly after I began this process, I met my husband who further helped me overcome my own destructive thinking.
Do you know one of the reasons why I knew my husband was "the one"? Because every time we left our conversations and or dates I felt like a better person and I wanted to be the best version of me. Not only for him but for myself. In loving me, he helped me love myself and love my body. Fast forward to about a year into our marriage-- I was at the healthiest weight and shape of my adult life. I was very healthy and happy.
Now fast forward to my pregnancy. I steadily gained weight and tried to stay active throughout. I also never said no to a craving! After little nugget arrived I refused to weigh myself for some time. My body was still (and is still) recovering and I wanted to give it time. But it was so hard to see and hear of friends that would say they lost their baby weight so quickly or completely. Meanwhile, I just wanted to be healthy and happy. One day, I stood in front of the mirror and that old me reared its face. As I stared at my post-pregnancy body I began to scrutinize my self again. Look at your fat jiggly thighs! Your body will never be the same! The words taunted me.
Then just as quickly as the thoughts came, they left. At that moment, our son woke up crying and I went over to pick him up. His cry quickly reminded me, that not too long ago, I held him in my womb. Those thighs and my "pooch" were all proof of how amazing my body is-- to be able to support another human being.
If you are a mother reading this now and are feeling ugly, fat and not quite yourself-- I want to tell you that you are beautiful. Your body supported life, carried it and it will take some time for it to heal and recover. I know that my body will never be exactly the same as before but I love it because it transformed me into a mother. And that is something that I would never take back.
Now fast forward to my pregnancy. I steadily gained weight and tried to stay active throughout. I also never said no to a craving! After little nugget arrived I refused to weigh myself for some time. My body was still (and is still) recovering and I wanted to give it time. But it was so hard to see and hear of friends that would say they lost their baby weight so quickly or completely. Meanwhile, I just wanted to be healthy and happy. One day, I stood in front of the mirror and that old me reared its face. As I stared at my post-pregnancy body I began to scrutinize my self again. Look at your fat jiggly thighs! Your body will never be the same! The words taunted me.
Then just as quickly as the thoughts came, they left. At that moment, our son woke up crying and I went over to pick him up. His cry quickly reminded me, that not too long ago, I held him in my womb. Those thighs and my "pooch" were all proof of how amazing my body is-- to be able to support another human being.
If you are a mother reading this now and are feeling ugly, fat and not quite yourself-- I want to tell you that you are beautiful. Your body supported life, carried it and it will take some time for it to heal and recover. I know that my body will never be exactly the same as before but I love it because it transformed me into a mother. And that is something that I would never take back.
So love your body, momma! You are beautiful!
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| love these-such a deal! |
Silk Red Blouse Banana Republic/Similar : B & W Striped Skirt Banana Republic/Similar : Patent Leather Pumps/Similar : Earrings Target/Similar : Lips L'Oreal True Red
We've got a similar fashion sense. Cute color & jewelry combo! ;)
ReplyDeletei love u cuz you perfect to the people that love u :):):):):) frances
DeleteLoved this posf! Very empowering!
ReplyDeleteThank you momma! And for taking the time to stop by and read :)
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